Captain Mal Explains

And Mal said........

I'm not quite sure why you think I would know; it's not like I took the

photo or anything like that....................well.........alright so I took the photo.

It was a favor for a friend of mine.  Actually it was a

favor for three friends of mine. There was this butcher, a baker and a

.....um.....ahh.......um............I think it was a candle stick maker.

No.....wait, I don't think it was Richard the candlestick maker, it was

Yorgi the big fat Maori pimp!  He doesn't usually like being called that

though.  He just prefers Yorgi the big fat Native New Zealand sheep

solicitor.  I think the word pimp makes him feel dirty.  Actually I always

ask him why he doesn't feel dirty sticking his dick in the arse of a sheep

and he always just laughs and slaps his knee and says ow Mal you kid me all

the time cousy bro.

Anyway, sorry, I was going to tell you why the picture was taken.  My

mate, Yorgi who owns the sheep had come to the realization that Clover

(that's the sheep's name) was becoming tenderized due to all of the

excessive ass pounding from lonely Kiwi gentlemen enough to be sold to my

other friend Jobbybum the Butcher (by the way, Jobbybum is a chick; not a

chicken, a girl)Jobbybum lives in a small but distant place called Scrag End

(which is also a specific favorite cut of Mutton around the neck), anyway

since I had internet connection, they asked if I could take the photo

because Yorgi has only one finger and it ain't an Index (please don't ask me

why he only has one finger; it's a very embarrassing and sordid tale).  I

think that Jobbybum wanted this specific sheep so badly because of the fact

that it has a tattoo under its wool of a 15" black penis (but that's another

story entirely and has nothing to do with the story or Yorgi's fingers.).

So there you go, just an innocent photo taken for a butcher.

PS. the girl in the photo, Lara, is married to Andre the Baker who has a

share in the cut of the sheep.  I think she is having an affair with Richard

the Candlestick maker (I think you can guess why huh)

Happy Valentines day everyone and I hope, just like my friend Yorgi, that

you all get exactly what you want.......in the end.

____________________________________________________________________